I’ve learned the following when it comes to being confident, making the right choices, and creating success and fulfillment in our life, our career, our business, and our relationships:
“We are successful at what we do when we are authentic to who we are.”
This is a quote that I formulated that guides me in my own life and the choices I make for myself, my family, the running of my business and the work that I do with my clients.
I have found time and time again that I make better choices, feel confident, and have clarity about my direction when I am approaching my life, my career, and my relationships from the Inside-Out and being authentic to myself.
At a talk I attended at a conference for small business owners, Amy Holtz, former co-owner of the Party City franchise in New York City, shared advice that aligns with my above message. In her talk, Amy said that before giving her talk she asked a number of successful CEOs what advice they would give to small business owners. Their answers were summed up by Amy in the following way. They said, “play to your strengths and forget about the rest.”
What do I mean by being authentic to who you are?
When I say ‘be authentic to who you are’, what I mean is to work in a way that is (and make choices that are) in alignment with your nature, your needs, your values and your beliefs.
When all of the above is clear to you, you will know what the best choices are for you to make for yourself. You will understand why you feel frustrated, why you are not feeling motivated, and why something isn’t working for you. You will have more confidence in yourself and you will feel free because you will be able to let go of feeling that you need to be a certain way in order to be successful and fulfilled. There are many benefits to knowing yourself well and what works for you.
How can you start getting to know yourself?
I will share three out of the number of resources I use to help my clients start understanding themselves better, so that you can start doing the same.
“It’s Just My Nature”, by Carol Tuttle
Carol Tuttle outlines 4 types of nature in her work and simply labels them Types 1 – 4. Type 1 is an Upward and Light nature, Type 2 is a Soft & Subtle nature, Type 3 is an Intense & Take Charge type of nature, and Type 4 is a Precise & Reflective type of nature. I have described the four types very simplistically. If you are interested in learning more, I encourage you to learn more about the 4 Types and see which one you think best describes you and your movement in the world. Please note, that it is important in this process to not judge yourself. If judgment comes up about your nature it may be because you have been judged for ‘being you’ at certain times in your life. As I understand it, Carol’s philosophy is that we are all part of nature and that we each have our own unique way of moving and functioning in the world. Just as we accept nature, we can accept ourselves and who we are knowing that we are a part of nature too. We are more successful, joyful and fulfilled in our lives when we are ‘living, – being and doing’ in alignment with our nature.
William Glasser’s Five Psychological Needs
In his book, Choice Theory, Dr. William Glasser outlines our five psychological needs. The needs he mentions are: Love & Belonging, Power, Survival, Freedom, and Fun. We all require each of these needs, but what varies is how much we require each of them. It is very interesting to explore our needs as it can help us to understand what motivates our choices, why we feel frustrated or unhappy in our life, career or relationships, and how to help ourselves feel more fulfilled.
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
While many use the Five Love Languages as a great tool to help you build wonderful and lasting relationships, I find that it is a great tool to help you learn about and understand yourself well too. The Five Love Languages are: Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time & Gifts. Understanding what your love language is will give you insight into how you best work, why you feel frustrated, defeated or depleted, what support you require, and how you can pro-actively get the support you require.
The above are some of the resources I delve more deeply into to help my clients gain a good understanding of themselves.
There are more resources that I use and I am always happy to learn about other resources, as well. If you have a resource you have found very helpful to you to help you get to know yourself better, please send me an email to let me know about them. I am passionate and always eager to learn more about how to understand ourselves better.
If you are interested in delving deeper and seeking support in helping you understand yourself (and others) better so that you can have clarity, confidence, and direction in your life, career and relationships, send me an email, or fill in your information here. Once you get in touch with me we can schedule a complimentary consultation and you can learn more about how I can help you with your next steps.
As always, please feel free to be in touch anytime with any questions or comments. I am ALWAYS happy to hear from you. You can reach me at: Jenny@unleashingu.com anytime.
In support and admiration,