Often when we are having trouble in our relationships or attracting wrong and unloving people to us, we put the blame on the other or outside circumstances. We do this because it is easier to find other excuses or to blame others for the lack of connection or the anger and pain that we feel. This is much easier than looking at ourselves and asking ourselves some important questions about why we may be attracting these people to us.
We generally attract the love that we feel that we deserve.
While on the surface you might be telling yourself that the person who just dumped you or left you at the curb (literally) is a jerk and that you deserve SO much better, on the inside you might not really believe that. Deep down inside you might really believe that you are not deserving of better.
How can you tell?
By looking at WHO you are attracting to you and WHO you surround yourself with.
Review the qualities and values of the people you are attracting to you in your life (be it intimate partners or friends.) Do they reflect your character, qualities and values?
If not, there is a good chance that either you have not defined those character traits, qualities and values for yourself or you are not respecting yourself and living in line with your qualities and values (or both.)
Take time this week to sit down and think about the people you surround yourself with. Who are they? What are their qualities and values? What do you think of them?
Are these the people you want in your life or want to be attracting to you?
If while doing this exercise you realize that you do not like who you are inviting into your personal life and relationships, have the courage to look within and ask yourself what you are required to change within you in order to attract loving and wonderful people into your life.
The things you might be required to change or redefine are:
- Your belief about yourself.
- How you treat yourself.
You might also want to get clear on:
- Who you are – what your values and qualities are.
- Whether or not you are respecting of and living in line with your qualities and values.
- The values and qualities of the people you want to surround yourself with.
If you want your outside (the people you invite into your life) to be good, loving and respecting of you, you have to be good, loving and respectful of yourself. It begins with you.
As always, be in touch anytime with any comments or questions. You can reach me Here.
In support and admiration,
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