The weekend is upon us. For some who are searching to meet a special someone to build a relationship with, the weekend may be an opportune time to get together with either a small group of friends or attend a larger social event where you might meet that ‘someone.’
But what if there aren’t any get-togethers or events happening that you know of. What then?
Sometimes we feel that if there isn’t ‘anything going on’ we have lost out on the opportunity to potentially meet that person we want to ask out and get to know better. This leaves us feeling stuck and hopeless.
But every time we are in any given situation, we have a choice. We can choose to be reactive (which includes complaining, and being passive and critical) or we can choose to be proactive (i.e. see our situation for what it is and do something about it.) When we choose to be reactive we end up feeling stuck, alone, and perhaps even depressed. When we choose to be proactive, we start to move, and feel energized, optimistic and hopeful.
I often speak to people who do feel stuck, alone and hopeless at times. It is clear to me that when they are feeling this way, they are choosing to respond ‘reactively’ to their given situation. I usually point this out to them and ask: What would a proactive response to your situation look like?
In a situation like this, when there aren’t any other social events that you know of that are taking place, a reactive response usually looks like this: There is nothing going on, I can’t possibly meet anyone now. There is nothing else that I can do. I will just sit home alone…again.
While a proactive stance looks more like this: I will create my own social event. I can and will invite some people over for dinner in my own home. Or, I can call up some friends and see if they would like to go out somewhere fun or interesting and ask them to invite some of their interested friends along.
Which response do you prefer?
What is your goal? What are you interested in accomplishing? What is getting in your way? How will you be proactive about your situation?
How to Get What You Deserve in Your Relationships | Jenny Sassoon, LMSW, CFC
[…] 4: Get proactive and let these people know how you feel about them and that you are interested in enriching your […]
You're Single. Does that Mean You Have a Problem? | Jenny Sassoon, LMSW, CFC
[…] (Click here to find tools on how to be proactive when it comes to dating and relationships.) […]