Last night as my husband led the children around our home to fulfill the traditional ritual of searching for chametz (leavened bread) before the Passover holiday, I sat on our couch and rested (it had been a long day of cooking and getting our home ready for the holiday.)
While I was resting, I closed my eyes and contemplated what chametz I might have inside myself (as suggested by my teacher, Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi.)
This chametz can be anything we personally want to ‘get rid of’ or work on in ourselves. I thought about what I wanted to ‘get rid of’ last year. I remember feeling a lot of anger (and choosing to ‘get rid of’ that last year.) I thought, “am I feeling that type of anger this year?” Thankfully, the answer to that question was no.
But I knew that there were other things that were holding me back this year from boldly moving forward in certain areas of my life. When I looked inside of myself – into my heart and my mind – I found fear, worry, doubt and at times a lack of belief in myself (yes, me too!)
I know that it is these thoughts and feelings that hold me back from boldly putting out my message, or leave me feeling unsure about myself at times. I also know that it is these thoughts that affect the way that I parent at times, or relate to the ones that I love.
This year I am choosing to ‘let go’ of these thoughts. It is not easy, but I know how important it is for me to do so. I know that by doing this I will be able to boldly move forward, without fear, to accomplish my goals and my dreams. I know that it is all up to me, and I am ready for the challenge (and getting the support that I require in order to do so.) This is the freedom that I want to experience this year.
Wishing that all of you experience your own personal freedom this holiday…and always. Happy Passover.