You know, I thought I was ‘healed.’ I thought I was done; that all of the work I have done to move away from past difficult experiences was finished. Although I have come a very long way since learning how to take back my personal power and freedom, there are times and days (which are much more rare now than they used to be when I was a teenager and in my early twenties) that past unpleasant memories creep into my mind. In fact, it happened just yesterday.
I was speaking on the phone with someone, and suddenly an image came to mind. I hated it and wanted it to get out of my head, and so I ended my conversation with that person.
I wondered why that had happened. It has been such a long time since I had experienced anything like that – thinking about and envisioning and unpleasant memory from my past. I did not want to spend time dwelling on it. I was not interested in thinking about why I was thinking about these memories again. It does not serve me any healthy purpose in my life right now.
I am a at a point in my life (and have been for a number of years already) where I do not dwell on the past, where I have learned how to get rid of feelings of blame, hate, anger, and pain. And I have only been happy, confident, and successful ever since. Going back to exploring my ‘angry’ feelings serves me no purpose. Asking myself Why did it happen? Should it have happened? Or wishing it had never happened – while all valid questions and thoughts – will get me (and has gotten me) nowhere (besides for a bit of sympathy, perhaps.)
So, what do I do instead?
Instead I choose to accept what is. I choose to accept that whatever happened, happened. It is done. Accepting ‘what is’ is calmer and easier than questioning why this or that happened and fighting against the reality of what ‘is’ or was. When I accept what is, I may be sad at first, but the acceptance allows me to move forward and continue thriving in my life.
We all have personal struggles, and in my experience, the most effective way to move forward and thrive in our lives is to first accept what is. Don’t fight it. Allow it. Accept what is, and then ask yourself: “Now what?” Now what will you do? Instead of dwelling on what you wish could be or should be or should have been, think about how you want things to be now. It is your life and you get to choose how to live it and how to be successful in it.
I believe that we are all capable of greatness and that when we take personal responsibility for our lives, and commit to moving forward, amazing things can happen.
That has been my experience and I know it can work for you too.
In support and admiration,
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Enjoy your day!